First Impressions

There are a million things I could write about right now. My life lately has been a whirlwind of emotion, adventure, and a whole lot of studying! I promised to keep y'all (yes I said y'all) updated on my life here at seminary and I've been really bad about doing so. Forgive me! When I'm not in class or working, I'm usually studying. It's a whole different lifestyle here. But, I think I'm finally getting used to the daily grind of it all. And, I'm loving it!

Here are some thoughts I jotted down after my first day of seminary back in August:

1. Everyone should go to DTS.
2. Hearing everyone's personal journey with Christ just radiates grace (we had to share each of our testimonies in my Hermeneutics class).
3. I am so fortunate to be here.
4. I feel overwhelmed by grace.
5. Just like the Lord washed the feet of Peter although he was resistant at first, I feel like the Lord is washing my feet and reminding me its not about knowledge at all, but about humility. I do not deserve to be here, but for some reason he chose me to be here.
6. The Lord is preparing me for something amazing and I feel incredibly blessed to be the one he uses.
7. God is teaching me to love and accept people from all walks of life.
8. God is bursting my Slavic Christian bubble and allowing me to see the world and His plan for the world as it really is.
9. I don't know anything and I have so much to learn.
10. Seminary is like summer camp (awesome community, the Word, solid teaching, and fun), but it's every day!

More to come! I promise!

Roadtrip Day 2: The grandeur of the Grand Canyon

The second day of the roadtrip was my favorite. That's because it included the Grand Canyon! I've always wanted to visit this world-renowned landmark and this was my opportunity to do it! It takes about 5 hours to get to the Grand Canyon from Las Vegas. The drive towards the canyon is mostly flat and deserty (is that even a word?!) with a few plateaus and cliffs along the way. It was so different from the landscape in California, or anywhere else I've ever been to.

After stopping at a country-themed steakhouse for lunch, we drove into the Grand Canyon park in the late afternoon. Until you actually pay and drive into the park, you can't see the Grand Canyon from the road. Once you're in though, the view is breathtaking! We quickly parked our car, put on some sneakers and headed to the Canyon. I couldn't help but marvel at the beauty of God's creation. The Canyon stretched as far as the eye could see. It was deep, majestic, and made you feel very small in comparison. I snapped lots and lots of pictures, so I'll let them do the talking! Enjoy!

Dad being his ol' goofy self!

"Hey Inna, take a picture of me like this!" - Dad

"If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there Your hand will guide me, Your hand will hold me fast."

This was our view leaving the Grand Canyon that day! Simply phenomenal. 

After leaving the Grand Canyon, we drove to Flagstaff, AZ to spend the night. The hotel (although supposed to be 3 stars on Priceline) was slightly better than a motel and cost more than our nice hotel in Las Vegas. The only good thing was the free breakfast, but oh wait, we slept through that! Thank God for Starbucks!

Day 3 and 4 of the roadtrip were not very exciting. Just a lot of driving through deserts and fields. We did stop at a Native American rest area somewhere in the middle of New Mexico and I bought a really cool Native American picnic blanket/rug. My dad thinks it's ugly but I like it a lot! After driving all day, we spent the last night  of the roadtrip in Amarillo, TX (which smelled like cows). The hotel was really cute and homey, and the staff spoke with a heavy Southern accent. It was so bad that my dad couldn't understand what the guy was saying! I had to translate! Let's just say we were both really amused at how different the English language sounds just a few states away!

Roadtrip Day 1: A night in Vegas

I promised to fill you in on my awesome roadtrip from Sacramento to Dallas, right? Well, here it is, photos and all!

After stuffing (and I mean stuffing!) my car with all my stuff, my dad and I set off on our roadtrip. It was a four-day ordeal with the first stop in Las Vegas! Neither of us have been to Las Vegas so we didn't have any idea what to expect. As soon as we entered the city, the thing that stood out the most is the amount of people EVERYWHERE! It was just about sunset and the people were all coming out for the night. Traffic was horrible and there were crowds of people on every sidewalk!

I've been to the Trevi Fountan in Rome and the Vegas version is just about the same size and grandeur!

To make the trip more of an adventure, we didn't have any of our hotels booked, so the first thing we did was look for a Starbucks so that I could hook up my iPad to wifi and book a hotel. After bidding on several hotels on Priceline with no luck, we gave up, parked our car, and went walking along the Vegas strip. Let's just say I was really glad my dad was by my side. There were lots of shady people around, most of which were high, drunk, or both. Little old ladies on street corners were advertising "Girls in 20 minutes." It made my stomach churn. Prostitution was rampant here, completely in the open, and pretty much glamorized.  No wonder it's called Sin City. It made me sick!

The Venetian! Riding a gondola (but in real Venice) is still on my bucket list.

We walked for a while, taking in all the sights around us. All the hotels are themed and very beautiful. We walked into several of the hotels and just looked around. Nightly rates were in the $300 range for most of them - meaning, way out of our price range! My favorite hotel was the Venitian. With gondolas reflecting on the water surrounding the hotel, it had a magical, almost-Disney feel to it. My dad's favorite was the Rome-themed Caesar's Palace. He couldn't help but take pictures of all the tile on the walls and floor. That's my dad!

Selfies are my dad's favorite. Can't you tell??

Welcome to the Palace!

After walking for what seemed like hours, we were finally tired (and hungry!) so we asked around for the best buffet in town. My dad loves buffets and especially seafood ones! We ended up going to the buffet in the Wynn. It wasn't a seafood buffet like we had hoped, but it was still really delicious. For around $30 a pop, we filled our plates with crab legs, oysters (my personal favorite!), meat, sushi, Italian food, and anything else that seemed appealing! It was overwhelming how much food there was! And, don't get me started on the dessert! I wanted to try every kind of cake, gelato and mousse they had! Thank God they had tiny portions so I tried about 2-3 of each! By the end of dinner, we were both stuffed and very satisfied.

Hooking up my iPad right there in the restaurant, we booked a hotel for the night that was about a block from the Strip. Although not as ritzy as the Venetian or Caesar's Palace, the Westin was modern and comfortable.

Overall, Day 1 of the roadtrip was a success! Although Vegas itself was a bit overwhelming for me, and not really a place I'd ever want to visit again, it was cool to see what all the fuss was about.

I was really hoping to see the Bellagio Fountain rendition of Andrea Bocelli's "Time to Say Goodbye," but no such luck! Still beautiful though!

One week with a bunch of seminary students

Ok, so I've survived my first week living in Washington Hall - the student apartment building here. Here are just a few quick things I've learned so far:

1. Seminary students are not the stereotypical nerdy kids who have deep theological conversations all the time. Actually, I have yet to hear a single deep theological discussion. I have heard discussions about boys, coffee shops, movies, college days, shoes, culture, etc. Basically, seminary students are just normal people. They just happen to love Jesus and want to serve in ministry.

2. Ukraine is big here. Already, I know a few people who are pretty much obsessed with Ukraine. I guess going on mission trips to Ukraine will do that to you. It's just interesting to find Americans who've been to Ukraine more times than I have. It kind of messes with my mind.

3. The American Christian culture is WAY different than the Slavic Christian culture. So many things that I was taught to consider as "sin" growing up are just part of culture here. DTS has a no-alcohol policy so that's not what I'm referring to. But, things like secular music, movies and dancing are totally ok here. Dating is also big. Apparently, there's lots of that going on. (Not that I think dating is a sin. It's just not as common in the Slavic Christian culture that I grew up in). American Christians are just more chill, and not so uptight about debatable or questionable things. Don't get me wrong. I'm not taking a side here, but just making an observation.

4. Southerners are really awesome people.  Seriously, the girls I've met here are just the sweetest. Everyone is really nice, hospitable and friendly. One afternoon I was leaving the apartment only to find a candy bar and note by the door for me. It was from a really sweet girl (also a DTS student) that I met at the Village Church on Sunday. How precious is that?!

The adventure has begun

Oh were do I even start? The past week has been a crazy blur of activities and of course emotions! After almost 4 full days of driving, my dad and I finally made it to Dallas. I still can't believe this is real.

My dad and I made this trip from Sacramento to Dallas into a fun  little big roadtrip, driving through Las Vegas and the Grand Canyon. The last Daddy-Inna roadtrip happened when I was 9 or 10 and it's probably one of the fondest childhood memories I have with my dad. This roadtrip is a close second. More on the roadtrip (and more photos!) in a later post. Back to my reality in Dallas.

Just a preview of the majesty of God's creation - the Grand Canyon!

Just in case you're wondering, I'm writing this from my bed in my new apartment in Washington Hall. And, it's past 3 a.m. One of the wonderful couples here at DTS, who used to live in Sacramento, invited me over for dinner at their apartment and we stayed up past midnight playing this board game called Settlers of Catan which apparently is the new rage among college students. Anyway, I had a great time at Anna and Yuriy's house just enjoying a yummy meal together, chatting, playing with their sweet little baby Gracie, and of course losing at this Settlers of Catan game. Go Anna! Did I mention I drank two large mugs of tea? THAT is why I am still up at this hour. Coffee? Nah. I can drink a whole cupful and doze off no problem. Tea? I'm wide awake, even 3 hours later. Note to self: don't drink tea. Ever. 

Other than not being able to fall asleep tonight, I've been adjusting to life here in Dallas very well. Granted, this is only Day 3. And, it's only my first day on my own. I dropped off my dad at the airport earlier today. By the way, my dad loved Dallas - all except the hot, humid weather. I'm no fan either, but you can't have it all, can you?

Dallas skyline
(from the 12th story of the Crowne Plaza Hotel)

I moved in all of my stuff and still have a bunch of cabinet space in the bathroom to spare! I guess I didn't bring that much stuff after all! My closet is a bit tight but still very comfortable and spacious. The Native American rug that I bought at a rest area in New Mexico turned out perfect for the closet! The floor of my apartment and room is buffed concrete so rugs are a must. Everything else is coming together fine too. All except for my bed, which I'm still waiting to be delivered (hopefully tomorrow!) So, right now, my bed is just a mattress on the floor. It's not ideal, but in a way, I kind of like it. It gives my room a modern edge. I'll post pictures of my space when it's finally all complete. Right now, there are still boxes in the corner and lots of blank walls and empty space. Boring, if you ask me. 

How's my roommate apartment-mate? She's awesome! Kristina has a very fun and bubbly personality, speaks with a slight Southern twang and is passionate about the Lord. She also walks dogs for a living and hates slimy food (like mushrooms). She has been nothing but welcoming, helpful, and sweet! I feel like we'll be great friends in no time!

As far as my emotions go, everything is still new, exciting, and fun. I haven't felt a bit lonely or homesick. Yet. I have a feeling it's all going to come at once in about a week or two. Pray for me! In my world, when it rains, it pours! But of course, God is with me even in the downpour, so I'll be alright. 

So, I guess this is it - as far as an update goes. More details to follow! Stay tuned.

Dallas, here's to the beginning of many adventures!

Step into my shoes (and my kitchen)

Summer is like that one popular (but obnoxious) relative we all have. When she arrives, she makes a grand entrance and steals the show, but then makes everyone go into hiding due to her overbearing and rude personality. Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating a bit, but this summer kind of feels like that. It's been in triple digits for the past week here in Sacramento. Stepping outside feels like stepping into a blazing furnace. Let's just say, I thank God every day for the person who was brilliant enough to invent air conditioning.

Anyway... I just want to share a few things from this week...

My goal this month is to cook more and go out less. Partly, this is to prepare myself for independent life in Dallas, and partly because my mom (who normally feeds me) is on vacation and so I'm forced to cook. I consider it a win-win. Something you should know about me is that I actually like to cook. I'm not talking about the kind of cooking that requires following a recipe. I'm talking about the check-whats-in-the-fridge, pinch-of-this-and-pinch-of-that kind of cooking that's creative (and kind of risky). So, this week, I cooked almost every day. Sometimes this cooking was nothing more than making a sandwich or salad, but for all intensive purposes, I call this cooking too!

Here's the story behind each one of my meals:

1. I'm a chicken kind of person. I mean, red meat is good but I try not to eat it very often, let alone cook it. But, I wanted to face my fear of red meat and try cooking it for the first time. After spending at least 15 minutes at the Safeway meat section, I finally settled on buying some premium cut beef (whatever that means). It was already thinly sliced so it was perfect for tacos! I skillet fried the meat, added some spicy taco seasoning, and wrapped it up in warm tortillas with fresh avocado, lettuce, tomatoes, onions, cilantro and canned corn! The meat was just a bit too tough but it was still delicious. I made enough for dinner and still had enough left over to bring in to work for my coworkers. Cha-ching!

2. My asiago cheese bagel with turkey, lettuce, avocado, cream cheese and pesto was a simple yet super filling meal. I really love pesto, especially on sandwiches. Making my own pesto is on my cooking bucket list. Anyone have a good recipe?

3. When I went grocery shopping at the beginning of the week (which was super fun!), I bought these great spicy buffalo chicken strips. Tossed in an iceberg lettuce and spinach salad with bell peppers and shredded fermano cheese, the chicken added a great kick. Ranch dressing cooled it down. It was a good combo. I ended up making this salad twice because it was so good!

4. Thanks to the wonderful blog of my friend Olviya (http://servingsisters.com/), I got exposed to this great way of eating grapefruit! Broiled! The recipe (which can be found here) is very simple and quick but the results are amazing. Who knew that sprinkling sugar and cinnamon on a half-cut grapefruit and broiling it would make it so delicious?! The picture above is from the first attempt of the recipe at my friend Lilly and Vlad's house... We all loved it! I made this again at my own house and shared a grapefruit with my grandma (who loves grapefruit) and it was a great late-night snack for the both of us. We drizzled honey on the sugar/cinnamon encrusted grapefruit and scooped it out with a spoon. Yum.

5. Stuffed mushrooms are kind of my favorite. I usually just make mine stuffed with cheese, chopped mushroom stems, and salt and pepper, but this time I had spinach and bell peppers in the fridge so I made spinach/bell pepper/cheese stuffed mushrooms. The key is in the cream cheese that binds all the ingredients together. They turned out yummy, although I thought the bell peppers took away from the spinach too much. Next time, I'll pass on the peppers. I brought extras in to work and my coworker loved them so much, she asked for a recipe... Umm, I didn't use a recipe! 

6. I work with this older gentleman named Mike, who is quite the ladies man. He always brings fruit, candy and his homemade food for all the ladies in the office. He loves to make people happy and is genuinely kindhearted and sweet. It was his birthday the other day and we wanted to return the kindness. So, we secretly planned a little potluck and invited him into the meeting room for a "meeting." He was definitely surprised and really appreciated all the attention! It was a success! Of course, the night before the potluck, I came home around midnight without a clue of what I would be bringing. After looking through the cupboards and the fridge, I settled on making a pasta. My grandma had some pretty yellow squash and zucchini in the fridge so I decided to make a yellow squash/zucchini and chicken angel hair pasta. I sliced up the squash and zucchini and fried them in olive oil. After a while, I tasted the veggies. The squash was perfect, but the zucchini skin was too tough. I probably should have peeled it. I ended up picking out all the zucchini and tossing it out. The zucchini idea was a fail, but I still wanted to salvage the dish so I cooked up some more squash, tossed it in with chicken, fresh tomatoes, and marinara sauce and voila! I had a pasta dish ready to go! Granted, it was at 1 a.m., but I did it. I made way too much pasta (I always overdo it on pasta portions!) so I had enough for the potluck and for people to take some home for their families. I think cooking for people is always way more fun than cooking for myself. Even at 1 a.m., feeling incredibly tired, I had fun cooking everything up, experimenting, and improvising. Is it just me, or does cooking give off an adrenaline rush?

7. Wait, there was a #7?! Yeah, (un)fortunately, I don't have a picture of this one. That's because it was gross. I made tilapia fish in a clam chowder sauce and it tasted nasty. Whatever you do, don't add canned clam chowder to perfectly good tilapia fish and try to bake it. It doesn't taste very good. Lesson learned.

Overall, it was a rather successful week staying true to my more-cooking-less-going-out goal. I only went out once - to sushi with my wonderful friend Amanda. I couldn't resist sushi (or hanging out with this beautiful soul sister!)

The name tag is from visiting
Bridegway Church's young adults Tuesday
night service (...which I loved).

In other news, my friend Natalie (who blogs with Olviya on http://servingsisters.com/) had her baby girl Fiona this week. Isn't she just precious? I can't wait to meet her, and squeeze her little dimpled cheeks! 

Congratulations on your
bundle of joy, Roman and Natalie!

Jehovah Jireh

Two years ago, I remember standing at kids camp with armed stretched out and tears rolling down my face as I cried out to God, "Lord, be my Provider." I had recently graduated from college, quit my dead-end job and for the first time since age 16, I was broke and unemployed. It was a difficult season in my life and I was desperate for God. I was doing everything I possibly could to find a new job but I wasn't going anywhere. I needed God to step in.

A rendering of the hospital my company in building in midtown.

Three (long) months after that day, I was sitting behind a computer desk at my current job. Not only did God come through as my Provider, but He exceeded all my expectations. God supplied me with all the things I ever wanted in a job... Being able to write creatively? Check. Work independently? Check. Good pay? Check. Vacation and benefits? Check. All-expense-paid travel? Check. What about a Christian boss? Yep, that's a check too! It was almost too good to be true. And yet, it was true; but only because this job was given to me directly by the Lord. And I knew it. There's no way my interview skills were that stellar, or my background and education that phenomenal. This was all God. There's no shadow of a doubt about it.

View of downtown Sacramento from the hospital rooftop

Because I love what I do and the company that I work for, you can imagine how sad I felt about leaving my job to move to Dallas (in 51 days - but who's counting?). So, before I made the bold step of telling my company that I'm leaving, I made an even bolder step. I asked my boss if I could stay with the company, but work part-time and remotely from Dallas. It was a wild proposition. I doubted they'd take the bite, but, I was willing to risk it. And so I did. Breaking the news to the boss went well (or so I thought), and for the next three weeks I didn't hear back anything. I was simply told that management was considering my proposition.

Again, I looked to my Jehovah Jireh, and asked him to be my Provider. He was faithful to His name before and I knew He would be faithful again. Just as God provided the ram for the sacrifice in place of Isaac for Abraham, I rested on the promise that He would provide for me. He was, in fact, Jehovah Jireh.

"And Abraham called the name of that place Jehovah-Jireh. As it is said to this day, In the mount of Jehovah it shall be provided." (Genesis 22:14)

Yesterday, I came in to work to find the red light of my answering machine blinking. It was wonderful news! The company had OKed my proposition, and they were even giving me an intern to help me do my job well remotely. I was ecstatic! Immediately, the verse in Matthew 6:33 came to mind, "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Over and over, God continues to show me His faithfulness and His provision. Praise the Lord!

This whole experience also brings to mind a beautiful old hymn, Great is Thy Faithfulness. Enjoy the music here, and be encouraged by the lyrics:

"Great is Thy faithfulness,” O God my Father,
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not
As Thou hast been Thou forever wilt be.

“Great is Thy faithfulness!” “Great is Thy faithfulness!“

Morning by morning new mercies I see;
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided—

“Great is Thy faithfulness,” Lord, unto me!

Summer and winter, and springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon and stars in their courses above,
Join with all nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy and love.

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth,
Thy own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow,
Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside!

Passion is coming!

“The really wonderful moments of joy in this world are not the moments of self-satisfaction, but self-forgetfulness. Standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon and contemplating your own greatness is pathological. At such moments we are made for a magnificent joy that comes from outside ourselves.” ― John Piper, Don't Waste Your Life

I remember feeling completely overwhelmed. Completely in awe of God. I thought to myself, "This must be what heaven feels like." I was standing in a giant stadium surrounded by thousands upon thousands of college students all singing "Our God is greater!" united together in one voice. I was at Passion Conference in Atlanta, GA and I felt small. I felt insignificant. And, God was stupendously magnificent!

My first time at Passion was in 2010. A group of my girlfriends heard about the conference, bought tickets almost a year in advance, and then, all together, we traveled all the way across the country to attend this life-changing event. We didn't know what to expect. We were just ready for an adventure.

Our Passion 2010 crew! 

My Passion 2010 family group - Alan (now serving as a missionary in NY), Ashley and Julie (both now married)

22,000 college student gathered together to make Jesus famous!

Passion is one of those events that blows your mind - not with it's enormity (even though 22,000 attendees is enormous! 60,000 in 2013!), not with it's organization (even though they managed to feed 22,000 hungry students in less than 30 minutes), not with it's music (even though you get to worship with people like Chris Tomlin, Christy Nockels, Matt Redman, David Crowder, etc), not with it's generosity (towels, towels, and more towels!) or even with it's creativity. Passion blows your mind because it's all about JESUS.

Jesus-centered messages.
Jesus-centered worship.
Jesus-centered prayer.
Jesus-centered community group conversations.
Jesus-centered giving.
Jesus, Jesus, and more Jesus.

And, what's even more amazing? Passion is coming to Houston in February 2014! Registration for the 2-day conference opens today! Since I'll be living in Dallas by then, Passion will only be a 3-hour drive for me! I couldn't be more excited!

If you've never experienced Passion and you're a college student (or 25 and under), this is your chance! Trust me. You will not regret it. It's worth every mile driven, every penny spent.

Register for Houston (Feb. 14-15) here: http://268generation.com/passion2014/hou/register/
Register for Atlanta (Jan 17-18) here: http://268generation.com/passion2014/atl/register/
For more details and info, visit: http://www.268generation.com/3.0/

See you at Passion 2014!

Let the decorating begin!

As of today, my move to Dallas is less than 2 months away! Oh how the time flies!I started a list of things I need to do before I leave and things are slowly getting checked off. (I love lists and checking things off is my favorite!) So, you can imagine how happy all of this makes me! The most recent "to-do" that got checked off is "Find a roommate and a place to live." Well, actually, I didn't "find" anything. It found me! A little over a week ago, a current DTS student contacted me about sharing an apartment on campus. Her previous roommate graduated so she was looking for someone to fill her place. Of course I said yes! Especially after I found out that we are 94% compatible on the DTS roommate-matching website (which I equate to match.com)! And, she's also a Christian Education major. And, she did full-time student ministry for 6 years. And, she's funny, outgoing, and super proactive about getting things done. Basically, (at least from what it seems) she's like the perfect apartment-mate for me. I say apartment-mate because I'll be getting my own room and bathroom and we'll just have to share a living room and kitchen. The other awesome thing is her living room and kitchen are already furnished! Score!

Which brings me to checklist item number 2: "Figure out how you're going to decorate your new room!" This one gets me super giddy! I love design, art, and decorating, but I haven't had an opportunity to decorate anything (besides my room 10 years ago). Here is where Pinterest becomes my best friend! I have an entire board of decorating ideas. I guess from all those pins, you can conclude that my style is kind of shabby chic with a modern twist. 

Here are the basics I'd like to incorporate:

1. Neutral (grey/cream) solids

2.. Bright/pastel accents

3. Lots of coordinating patterns (especially chevron)

4. Modern (maybe upholstered) bed frame

5. Vintage (more just thrift store) accent furniture

6. Old maps, globes, treasure chests, chalk boards, picture frames

It will be cool to see what I actually end up doing. Pinterest is one thing. Decorating on a grad student's budget is another. Stay tuned for the final result!

Here are some photos from my Pinterest board of inspiration:

Random Things I'm Learning:

First day of camp! (The new location is AMAZING!)

1. I should never pass up the opportunity to serve. MGC Kids Camp is this week and I feel like I'm really missing out. When I'm at camp, I feel like that's where I belong. I'm serious. If I could do anything and be anything, I would be a full-time camp counselor. Jesus, kids, and nature - it doesn't get much better!

2. I need to treasure the day-to-day moments spent with family. I found out this morning that the little 5-year-old nephew of one of my friends died last night in a tragic accident. My heart has been heavy all day as I'm praying for God to supply the family with transcending peace and comfort.

Late night tea with my silly boys! 

Grace + works. This has been on my heart lately.

3. Pretty much all DTS students are super cool. So far, I've been contacted by three girls who are looking for roommates for the Fall and all of them are so cool. I look through their Facebook profiles (I admit, I'm kind of a stalker) and I think, "Wow! I can totally be your friend! You're so cool!" Jesus pretty much radiates from all their photos, statuses, activities, etc.

4. God can do miracles in people we "write off." I saw this happen this weekend as one of my old friends from high school recommitted her life to the Lord. Praise God that His love never fails and never gives up, even if we do.

5. I need to live in the "now" and not live in expectancy of the next big thing. God operates even in our boring, ordinary lives. I must be faithful and trust Him. I need to "bloom where I'm planted!" (I love that part of my "homework" for my online DTS class is to read and respond to a devotional every day! If you're not doing this yet, check out My Utmost for His Highest. It's available as a free PDF.)

What is God teaching you? Do share!

You are where you are because of holiness

We often go through life living selfishly, seeking "happiness" or "success," without stopping to ponder on the real purpose of life. And not just any life. I'm talking about our Christian life. Have you ever wondered, "What is my purpose? Right now? Right here?" 

What if I told you your purpose is holiness? Yes, holiness. What if I judged every action, every word, every thought, by how it will impact MY holiness?

I listened to a great sermon by John Piper quite a while ago and it's been whirling in my head ever since. (If you want to listen to the full sermon, check it out here: Healed for the Sake of Holiness) In his sermon, Piper explains how Jesus healed the man at the pool of Bethesda, not simply for the sake of physical healing, but  so that the man may come to know Him and turn from sin. The man was healed so that he may become holy.  (Holiness was also the topic we covered last week in my Spiritual Life online class at DTS so it's a topic that's been on my mind a lot lately.)

What is holiness, you ask? Holiness is complete separation. It is literally translated to mean "to set apart" or "to mark off." Holiness is complete separation from evil and sin. Usually, when we speak of holiness, we speak of God. God is holy. If I were to explain holiness to a 10-year-old kid, this is the word picture I would use:

The closet of a typical little girl is usually filled with lots of different dresses. There are the casual dresses that are worn every day. They tend to be more ragged, sometimes stained and always wrinkled. They often get tossed on the closet floor, where they get stepped on and kicked around. Those dresses can easily be thrown in the washing machine with the rest of the dirty laundry. However, in that same closet is a very different type of dress. Unlike the casual dresses that end up in the corner of the closet floor, this dress is kept in a tightly zipped garment bag. This dress is sparkly white, silky smooth and has never been worn. It is kept completely separate from the other clothes. It’s not a dress that can be worn to go to the park or to the zoo. It’s a dress specifically made to be worn to a wedding banquet. 

You see, this pretty white dress is like the holiness of God. Just like the pretty white dress is separate from the other dirty dresses in the closet, God is separate from all things that are dirty, broken and ordinary. To be holy means to be separate from all unclean things. Just like the pretty white dress that is clean, pure, and never been worn, God is also pure and clean. He does not get dirty with sin. He is different from ordinary people because he has extraordinary characteristics. He acts differently than people do. For example, God is perfectly loving and perfectly fair at the same time. Just like the pretty white dress that is meant to be worn only at a wedding, God has a different purpose than people do. Because God is holy, He also wants people to be holy. He wants people to be like that pretty white dress that is kept pure and separate from the rest of the dirty things.

I know, I know, it's a very elementary description of God and holiness, but hear me out. Reason with me. If God is holy and His Word states that we must be holy as He is holy (1 Peter 1:14-16: "As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance, but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written, “YOU SHALL BE HOLY, FOR I AM HOLY.”), then everything that we say, do and think must aim toward holiness. The beautiful thing is that we cannot be holy on our own. Our holiness is completely dependent on the Holy One himself. His grace alone can make us holy. He brings holiness out of us. For that reason, He allows certain things to happen to us in order for those things to bring out holiness in us. Plainly speaking, God allows illness into our lives to bring about holiness. God allows health into our lives to bring about holiness. You see, it's the same answer for everything. Singleness - for holiness. Marriage - for holiness. Suffering - for holiness. Joy - for holiness. Unemployment - for holiness. Wealth - for holiness. Children - for holiness. Infertility - for holiness. And the list can go on forever.

God knows what each person needs in order for that person to be holy. For one person, it may mean that he or she needs to be married. For another person, it means he or she needs to be single. And so on. In all cases, God desires to bring about holiness. In me. In you. It is only in holiness that we are united with God.

Even in the Old Testament, (I'm reading through Leviticus right now), God allows the nation of Israel to experience war, famine, captivity, etc. to bring about holiness in His people. God is not sending calamity upon His people because He hates them and wants to see them struggle. Instead, He does so because loves them and wants them to look up to the Lord, recognize their dependence on Him and turn away from their false idols. God wants His people to be separate from the world and united with Him in perfect holiness.

Are you thinking this way? Are you considering the situation you're in right now as a means toward the greater end of holiness? Or, are you complaining about your plight? Are you blaming God for the situation, or are you thanking Him for working on you, your character, your holiness?

Simply giddy

Giddy. Yes, giddy.  That's how I would describe my current state. I'm simply giddy.

I started my first class at DTS this week! Granted it's online, but still. I'm officially a Dallas Theological Seminary student! It's beyond exciting. The class is PM101 - Spiritual Life and our first assignment was to post a little autobiography about ourselves and then respond to other students. I'm fascinated with each person's story! Each person comes from such a different background and yet at some point in life, God stepped in and flipped their world upside down. Most of the students that have already posted their autobiographies became Christians later in life, usually during their college years. I was especially inspired by the autobiography of one student. She was born into a very well-educated Hindu family. She became a Christian as a senior in college and is only one of two people in her whole family to be a believer. What a story of courage! When writing my own autobiography I realized how exceptionally blessed I am to be born into a Christian home and be brought up in a nurturing church of believers. It's truly humbling. Because I grew up in this Christian Slavic Sacramento bubble I don't think I really valued my upbringing and community enough. We are so privileged to grow in faith and spiritual maturity with such a "cloud of witnesses."

I'm also super excited about my upcoming move to Dallas. DTS has this housing website that I equate to Match.com because it matches you with people who you are most compatible with (roommate-wise). I've had my profile on the site for almost a week and today was the first time I got an email from a possible roommate. Being the "investigator" that I am, I checked her out on Facebook and she looks like such a fun and laid-back person. I may be jumping to conclusions way too quickly, but she seems like someone I'd get along with really well. I can't wait to see who I actually end up with! The excitement of it all is getting the best of me!

Here's what my profile sounds like... Do I sound like a cool person to live with?

 Bedtime: 12 PM
 Wakes up: 9 AM
 Security: Lock the apartment only when we are not home
 Conflict: Talk about things
 Sharing: I prefer to be asked for permission before sharing anything
 Cleaning: Usually orderly and clean (each clean our own mess) 
 Goes out: Once or twice a week
 Looking for someone who: Is outgoing
 I hope my @roommate and I: Be friends and spend some time together
 Have a significant other who will be around: No
 Smoking: No
I'm an incoming DTS student, relocating from Sacramento, CA. I will be studying Christian Education at DTS. I'm outgoing and can strike up a conversation with pretty much anyone. I love to be spontaneous, explore new places and try new food. I love coffee and hanging out in cool coffee shops. My ultimate passion is student ministry and teaching. I've been teaching a teen Bible class at my church for the past three years and I hope to continue working with high schoolers or college kids in the future! When it comes to my "home life," I tend to be a night owl, often staying up past midnight. But, I really like my sleep and even though I have to get up early right now because of work, if I get a chance to sleep in, I take it! My room tends to be fairly clean but never really spotless. When I'm at home, I'm usually more reserved and quiet. I like to have my alone-time to read, study, or write. I also like to cook and experiment with new ingredients and dishes. When it comes to others, I value honesty over every other virtue and really respect people who can tell me the truth even if it hurts. I would like to live in Washington Hall and am looking for an apartment-mate or even a roommate who I can be comfortable around and who shares some of the same interests. Hopefully that's you! Text me at (916)XXX-XXX if you are looking for a apartment-mate/roommate.

Replacing storm debris

I've definitely broke my promise to post something every week... Forgive me folks! I'd love to tell you a really fantastic excuse for not posting but I don't have one. Simply said, I haven't really had much to say. And I've been lazy.

That being said, for the past few weeks I've been in this weird funk. Even though life is going great (I've been celebrating my birthday all month!) it just seems like every morning when I wake up, I'm already tired. I go to bed and I'm still tired. Even after taking almost a whole week off to relax a little (one weekend in San Diego and the next weekend in Mendocino) it seems like I can't get rested. It's just this constant run, run, run, and do, do, do. The list of things to do never gets annihilated. It only seems to grow. With each item that gets crossed off, at least two more show up. It's a never ending cycle and I often feel like a hamster in a stationary wheel.

In addition to all of that, I make promises to myself that I cannot keep. I tell myself I'm going to go to sleep early today. Only to find myself climbing into bed well past midnight. I promise myself I'll wake up early to read the Bible before going to work and I end up hitting snooze 30 times. That's not even exaggerating. So what's going on? Why is it that the simple things in life cause our world to seem out of control?

I wish I knew. But I don't. All I know is I want to be lost in the embrace of my Father and just rest. Just find peace. So, this is my prayer this morning (in poetry form):

My soul is weary, yearning peace
There's nothing I can do
This boat is crumbling underneath
Splintering my bare feet

But Jesus, you are Prince of Peace
So calm this storm in me
just as you did in Galilee
When darkness, wind prevailed

Please call me into your embrace
Strengthen my feeble knees
That I may walk atop those waves
That aim to swallow me

I want to feel the gentle springs
Of living water flow
Deep into my thirsty soul
Replacing storm debris

Celebrating the Risen King!

I woke up this morning with these lyrics ringing in my ears: "Because He lives, I can face tomorrow!" Isn't that glorious? Because we have a king that is sovereign and eternal, we have no fear of the future. Jesus is risen! Yesterday, today and tomorrow, he remains the same. The "official holiday" is over but the news of his resurrection has no limits. Let us celebrate the risen King all year long!

Crazy enough to trust

About 6 months ago, I got this crazy idea to go to grad school at Dallas Theological Seminary. I say crazy because at the time it was just a distant dream - one that was too big to fathom. But, here I am registered for classes for my first semester. I still can't believe this is happening. It's still crazy.

Over the course of these past few months God has been teaching me a lot - everything from patience to humility to surrender. The biggest lesson has definitely been on trust, which goes hand in hand with surrender (my One Word Resolution for this year - more on that later).

Trusting God isn't something I'm good at. But, I'm not sure many people are. We tend to trust God for a little bit, then take matters into our own hands, and what do you know, we fail. We fail miserably. Yet, for some reason we do it all over again.

Take the Israelites for example. For a long time, I found the story of Moses freeing the Israelites from Egypt kind of weird. I mean, why would God send Moses to Egypt and then harden Pharaoh's heart? Ten times! Wouldn't it be much easier for God to soften Pharaoh's heart so that the Israelites could go free right away? Why the plagues? Why the back and forth charades? But, it seems like every time I read this story in the Bible, I missed the point.

God didn't harden Pharaoh's heart to teach him a lesson. God wasn't playing the role of a magician either. He wasn't displaying His power just for the fun of it. You see, while the Israelites were in slavery, they had become hopeless. They didn't see redemption on the horizon. And, they didn't know what it even meant to trust God. God was distant and silent, as far as they knew.

But the Israelites only saw their side of the story. They had no idea God was plotting their redemption all along. So, to teach His chosen people trust and total dependence in the desert, God had to prep them in Egypt. He displayed his omniscience and omnipotence so that their faith may be awakened and their trust renewed.

I've been watching the History channel Bible miniseries every
Sunday since it came out...  Definitely the inspiration for this blog post!

Imagine if this didn't happen. Imagine if Moses waltzed into Pharaoh's palace, shouted the famous "Let my people go!" and Pharaoh immediately melted in his presence, freeing the Israelites from their bondage. What would have been the reaction of the Israelites? Do you think they would have instantly developed trust in God?

The truth of the matter is that trust in God takes time. It is developed through trials, misunderstandings, pain, helplessness, confusion, and so much more. We know this is definitely true when we fast forward the story of Moses and the Israelites just a few chapters. We see that even all the miraculous wonders performed by God in Egypt were not enough to stifle the Israelites' grumbling against Him in the desert. They were not quick to learn. But the miracles sure helped. When the Israelites doubted God, they were able to look back and remember. It gave them a foundation for their trust in God.

This makes me think of my journey with God. When I look back on my life, I see how He has shown me His grace and mercy over and over again. I marvel at the way He used every experience in my life to bring me to the place I am in now. I look at where I am now and can't help but think of it as precise preparation for what is ahead.

God had a marvelous plan for the Israelites, even though they failed to see it. God has a marvelous plan for me, and I pray that I may see it. See it, not with physical eyes, but see it with my heart. See it by trusting God completely - fully confident that He is slowly leading me into the Promised Land. Now, that's crazy!